214- What is Uniquely Hard & Hopeful for Married People Now?

Posted by: WCSG & Hole In My Heart | Friday, January 26th, 2024 (12:00am)

Is anyone else feeling like they are in a rut in their marriage?

Maybe you’re not in crisis mode, but it’s kinda just . . . meh?

It’s easy to function. Sit on opposite couches and scroll on your phone. But, do you wonder if marriage could be better than that—not with some fantastical potion or even a weekend intensive per se, but what if it began with small, simple movements of risk toward one another?

Today, marriage experts Tracy Johnson and Chris Bruno guide those of us who feel “in a rut” toward a gentle path of hope.

How?

Grab a coffee drink you’ve never ordered before (you’ll get this reference after you listen ;)), and pull up an earbud.

(Oh, and single friends? Thanks for listening and being a friend to us as we figure out this heavenly metaphor as you figure out yours. (See episode 213 for more on this.))

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

“In the last couple of years we have seen couples move into a devolution of trust. People have stepped away from a posture of generosity toward their spouses into a posture of protection.” —Chris Bruno

“What I have found with the couples that we are working with is . . . they are profoundly disconnected and incredibly lonely. The surgeon general’s report that came out in May that the greatest mental health crisis we are facing as a country is actually tied to loneliness, and we are seeing the manifestation of that in the couples that are coming to us. They say, ‘I’m so lonely. How can I be so lonely in this marriage?’ . . . but without the tools to bridge that disconnection.” —Tracy Johnson

“We live in a broken world where we assume, ‘If I risk, I will be missed.’ But what if we begin to build some trust so that we think, ‘If I risk, what if I am seen’?” —Chris Bruno

QUESTION OF THE WEEK:

What is *in* for you for 2024, and what is *out*?

DO THE NEXT THING:

Find Tracy and Chris’ work here

That year of good dates?? Here

Matt and Laurie’s fave marriage book? Here

Laurie and Matt’s marriage book? Here

Join the HIMH Pod FB page here!

Learn more about HIMH: https://lauriekrieg.com/podcast/

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